SOJOURN

“As you walk on the way, the way appears.” ~ Rumi

Have we met before? If we have, you probably remember me as the woman who always wore high heels, specifically pointy-toe ones, who was always running from one place to another, working long hours, and answering phone calls in the middle of the night from staff in need of guidance or a decision about client care.

You might also know that I moved to Sacramento while keeping my primarily in-person job in the Bay Area for about three years. That meant that on the days I commuted, I would spend five hours, on average, in traffic. Yes, I can feel how tired you got reading those sentences. I was exhausted myself.

Transition

My move from the Bay Area to Sacramento, while a great decision, impacted my social life, as my friends and grandchildren were all in the Bay Area, and the commute allowed for very little interaction with the outside world on my days off. The exhaustion caused by that way of life prompted my decision to end my job in San Jose in February 2020, and a couple of weeks later, the whole planet went on lockdown due to COVID-19.

My plans of landing a job, meeting new people, and engaging in social activities in Sacramento vanished with the shutdown. It was both painful and hilarious. Eventually, and true to form, I found a job that took me back to the insanity of a life consumed by other people's needs—one where my boundaries were tested once and again. When the job ended, I was both distraught and relieved.

The Gift of Temporary Disability

While I was still grappling with the end of my job, I decided to focus on what I could control and made an appointment to get my annual physical exam.

As I discussed my health with my new primary care physician, I mentioned the discomfort in my feet that had accompanied me for more than ten years because the lengthy recovery from the proposed surgery seemed impossible to accommodate in my busy schedule. Before I left my doctor's office, she had scheduled an appointment with a podiatrist.

A couple of weeks later, I made it to the appointment with the podiatrist, who recommended surgery but told me that she was booked solid for the next three months. However, about five minutes into my drive home, I got a phone call from her scheduler inviting me to take a surgery date twelve days later. What happened to my three months? Twelve days!

I said yes, and hot damn, my days of running in heels despite the pain came to a screeching halt. Weeks turned into months as I tried to recover.

Nowhere to go but within.

I opted for no pain medication, which meant that I also chose to endure the healing process sitting down with my foot up for hours on end.

My ability to get busy and run away from myself was gone. I was left sitting in front of a TV set I had bought months before and had seldom turned on. The whole process was discombobulating.

Journeying Within

Since I could not physically move, I went on a journey within. What had I been daydreaming about for years? What had I been running away and hiding from through the years of keeping myself exceptionally busy? What themes were my thoughts and self-talk revealing? And more importantly, what untapped resources were trying to make themselves known to me?

As I looked into the future, one thing was clear: I wanted to be done with the surgeries and requested my surgeon to perform the second procedure just five months after the first one. She agreed but highlighted it would mean many more months of sitting and limiting my movements, not to mention putting my whole weight on a foot that was still healing. Although dreading what was coming, I opted to go into surgery again and be done with that process.

SOJOURN

While recovering, I joined a year-long coaching program and embarked on a journey of self-discovery and inner work. I hired a therapist and a spiritual coach and have been doing crucial transgenerational and lineage work.

More importantly, I founded Soulful Sojourners, a long-held dream, and created SOJOURN based on twenty years of research and countless hours in front of clients. Moreover, I became the ultimate test subject of my work.

Whether intentionally or cosmically forced by the pandemic, the ending of my new job, or my surgeries, my life has changed drastically in the past few years. All events leading to the creation of my company served as catalysts for introspection, self-discovery, and the reevaluation of my values and objectives.

The obstacles on my path are turning into opportunities as I take advantage of the cumulative nature of the learning process and the ability to reconnect with my values, test whether my actions align with them, and adjust the map whenever necessary. Reflection, adaptation, and new beginnings are all in service of my soul's unlimited potential.

I will share more insights on the model and its application in future posts. As for my high heels, eighteen more months, baby. Yes, I am counting the days.

Conclusion

Sometimes, we take a leap of faith, and sometimes, we are pushed off the cliff. My experience is a combination of both.

Whether we choose to live intentionally and believe that we are the authority in our lives or believe in the organizing power of the universe, we are still the ones tasked with making choices and living through their positive or negative consequences.

I hope you become fiercely self-aware and responsible for yourself and your creations. I encourage you to pause and focus on your inner monologue or conversations with imaginary people. And, if you can, record yourself talking out loud. It is illuminating. Take note of the aspirations that come to mind when you visualize your future.

What are some long-held dreams that feel both within reach and yet so far away? Consider what resources you might have access to if you pursued them. Make a list of whatever comes to mind. Do not be concerned with anything but what is on your list. We will talk about "the how" soon enough.

Until we meet again on these pages or a discovery call, stay safe, fellow sojourner!

Neidy Lozada, MATP, ATCC, CSIC, is an adaptive integrative and spiritual integration coach. She brings over twenty years of experience in transpersonal practices, coaching, and business to her work with individuals from all over the globe. She founded Soulful Sojourners following her long-held dream of building a company to provide top-notch coaching services to women, men, and organizations undergoing a profound transformational process. Neidy continues to serve non-profit organizations in the Bay Area through her work as a board member. She is a proud mother, grandmother, daughter, sister, and devoted caretaker of furry companions.